


Like a Corkscrew to the Heart

by Kaleton



Category: Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - 1960s, Alternate Universe - College/University, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-26
Updated: 2016-09-26
Packaged: 2018-08-17 11:12:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8141743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaleton/pseuds/Kaleton
Summary: She didn’t date much but she definitely didn’t date guys like Han Solo – a dropout with no real ambition, a guy who clearly didn’t care about other people’s feelings. Still, she was drawn to him, his crooked smile and attitude. She spent her days at Berkeley surrounded by guys who tried so hard to be smart and well-read and political, and here was a guy who didn’t care about any of it. And it was intoxicating.
A story in four parts. Rated M for later chapters.





	

Leia always missed Vermont most in the fall. She loved Berkeley, loved being away from home, having new experiences and learning. 

But Vermont had autumn, which Leia missed almost as much as she missed her parents. Han had propped open the windows in his apartment in an attempt to usher in a non-existent breeze, and the heat made Leia miss 50-degree weather and leaves falling from trees. Hazy, damp air hung uncomfortably no matter where you went, making the whole town feel unpleasantly suspended in time, the air too heavy for anyone to move through.

She and Luke had come to Han’s to watch the Beatles on the Ed Sullivan show, since he was their only friend with a television. Han and Luke were passing a joint between them, and the smoke was overwhelming. But the smell made her nostalgic too. Nostalgic for the first time she and Luke had met Han, at a party at Lando Calrissian’s house in freshman year, where Han sat in the corner smoking with Chewie and pretending he didn’t see how many girls and guys would stare at him. He and Luke had gotten talking about Kerouac and The Rolling Stones and other things Leia didn’t care for, but she sat nearby, listening and smoking. She found Han magnetic. 

She didn’t date much but she definitely didn’t date guys like Han Solo – a dropout with no real ambition, a guy who clearly didn’t care about other people’s feelings. Still, she was drawn to him, his crooked smile and attitude. She spent her days at Berkeley surrounded by guys who tried so hard to be smart and well-read and political, and here was a guy who didn’t care about any of it. And it was intoxicating.

After Ed Sullivan, Perry Mason came on, and Luke went to the kitchen to get snacks. Leia cracked open her international relations textbook. 

“Are you actually doing homework right now?” Han goaded her. She rolled her eyes. Han routinely told her how much he disliked formal education, but Leia didn’t let it interfere with their friendship. She liked how he challenged what she thought, even if she never let on that she did. 

 

“Honestly princess, I think you’re too ambitious for your own good. You won’t take a break from school for five minutes? God, you’re boring once school starts,” Luke heard from the kitchen. As bullying as Han’s words were, Luke caught the tone of flirting in his voice, and something stirred in the pit of his stomach. It was the same feeling he’d gotten when Han first asked him if Leia could be interested in him. It had hurt him in some unidentifiable way, some way he couldn’t name but made him tense up and made his stomach ache. He wanted to be happy for Leia – but that unknown painful feeling made him want to do what he could to drive a wedge between the two. 

Finding some apples and a box of Wagon Wheels in the pantry, Luke walked back to the living room. Leia had abandoned her book to sit on the couch, her hand resting on Han’s knee, Han leaning in so their faces seemed mere inches apart. The floor creaked as Luke walked in and the pair leapt apart. That feeling rose in Luke again, and he plopped himself down between them. Leia was clearly flustered and pretended to be totally absorbed in Perry Mason, while Han was nonchalant, grabbing an apple and grinning at Luke in his sideways manner. Luke couldn’t help but smile and duck his head when Han did that. He unwrapped a Wagon Wheel and leaned back.

Luke’s mind drifted to school as he watched Leia, highlighting her textbook and chewing an apple. He wanted desperately to be more like her – Leia made the Dean’s List every term, organized campus protests, always made Padme and Anakin proud. Luke knew his parents weren’t particularly disappointed in him, but he had no clue what he wanted from life, and he spent more time smoking and cruising around town on his bike than he did studying.

 

Groaning, startled from his sleep by the CBS news music, Han shifted on the couch, sitting up slightly. Leia was missing from her spot on the couch and Han assumed she’d gone upstairs to sleep. Curled up on the other end of the couch was Luke, watching the anchor blankly describe another day of conflict in Vietnam, and protests in America. 

Han felt rather ambivalent about the war, and just about anything else political happening. Logically, he knew the way he lived was countercultural, being a bisexual stoner who dropped out of high school, but he couldn’t be bothered to join Leia at any of her protests, and he didn’t find himself getting frustrated at LBJ as though the president’s every action were a personal attack. Han liked to think he lived separate from the government, free to sleep with who he wanted and smoke what he wanted, and not feel controlled by what happened outside of Berkley. He knew Luke and Leia didn’t agree, but it wasn’t worth bringing up with them. Their friendship was based on television and pot and biking to the beach – it didn’t matter that the twins actually gave a shit about the world, because Han’s world was the size of the town, his job and his friends and the people he fucked, a world somehow apart from the one on the news. 

Luke glanced over at Han and sighed, then darting his eyes back to the TV. It was clear he wanted to talk about the news, and Han unhappily obliged – Han did pretty much anything the Skywalker twins wanted. 

“Aren’t you afraid of being conscripted? If I leave school, I could be conscripted.”

Han sighed. “Luke, I know. But it ain’t happened yet.” 

“So what? You just won’t think about it?”

“Cross that bridge if I get to it. And if I do, I’ll be fine. I’m not gonna die, kid.” Luke looked away, and Han knew Luke didn’t believe him. Reaching out for his friend, Han whispered, “We’re gonna be fine, both of us.” Han kissed the top of Luke’s head and squeezed his shoulder. “Get some rest.” Luke nodded sleepily, but didn’t seem reassured. 

Han headed upstairs to his bed, where he hoped Leia was waiting. Luke’s concern weighed on him in a way things usually didn’t, and he found he needed Leia’s comfort, needed to wrap his arms around something solid. 

Leia stirred when Han came into the room. Stripping off his tight jeans and t-shirt, Han slipped into bed next to Leia. 

“Hi.”

“Hi.” 

Leia looked at him closely, and nuzzled her nose against his. Han was taken aback by the affection, but he didn’t want to question it. He’d never admit it to her, but he’d wanted her as long as they’d known each other. Since the party at Lando’s when he’d been too high to remember much of what happened, or what he’d said, he remembered her. 

She wrapped her arms around his neck and he pulled her closer, kissing her cheeks and neck, before planting a kiss squarely on her mouth. She responded eagerly, opening her mouth and kissing him deeper. Moving his hands down to her waist, Han moved his lips to her ear, nipping at her lobes. 

“Han…” 

“What?” 

“I’m tired, god, it feels good, but I’m so tired.” Han trailed his mouth down her neck, kissing her once on the shoulder before pulling away, resting his head on the pillow next to her. Leia closed her eyes and curled herself into Han. 

“Goodnight Han.”

“Goodnight Leia.” 

 

Han and Leia came downstairs together the next morning, and Luke tried not to show his disappointment. Munching his cheerios, he looked out the window and pretended he hadn’t noticed them. Leia slipped into the chair next to him and yawned. 

“Late night?”

Leia swatted his arm. “God Luke, no. We just slept.” 

“Good.” 

“Luke, it’s none of your business. If you wanted to sleep with someone I wouldn’t judge you for it,” Leia said, pouring herself a glass of orange juice.

“I’m not judging you,” Luke snapped, dropping his spoon into his empty bowl so it clattered loudly. Han poked his head out of the kitchen, and the twins both smiled at him innocently. Shrugging, Han went back to brewing coffee. 

Leia went back to arguing with her brother. “So, if you aren’t judging me for who I do or do not sleep with, why do you have to comment on it? Han is our friend!” Luke looked down quietly.

Meeting her brother’s eyes, Leia asked, “Do you like him?” 

“I don’t know, Leia!” Luke shot back. Leia breathed in heavily, about to argue back when Han stepped back into the dining room with three cups of coffee. 

While Luke stirred sugar into his cup, Leia ate dry cereal straight from the box and threw back her coffee quickly.

“In a hurry, princess?” Han teased.

Leia rolled her eyes. “I have class.” 

Han shrugged and sat down next to Luke. “See you later.” Luke didn’t say goodbye, just shot Leia a look and drank his coffee. 

 

Leia found her brother sitting at a picnic table reading Catcher in the Rye and smoking a cigarette. She inhaled deeply, preparing herself for what she had to say. Typically, Leia was brash and unconcerned with offending others, but her brother was different. He was, technically, older than her, but she felt protective of him and his feelings. Which is what made it so complicated that they both happened to like the same guy. The two always shared about their crushes, and Luke had come out to her years before; the issue had just never come up before. 

She slid into the seat across from Luke.

“I’m sorry,” she said.

“Why would you be sorry?” Luke asked.

“I – I think I hurt your feelings when I asked you about, you know, about what you feel for Han. And I really do think it’s okay if you like him,” Leia explained, the words feeling awkward and insufficient.

Luke dog-eared the page in his book and sighed. “No, he likes you. We both know it. Don’t let me stop you from doing anything.”

“But you’re hurt,” Leia countered. 

“Of course I am! But we both know you’re his type and I’m… not.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Just that you’re smart and strong and you’re beautiful.”

“Don’t be petty.”

“I’m not. I’m being honest, Leia.”

Leia sighed, exasperated. “I came here to apologize, not argue with you. All I wanted to say was I understand what you’re feeling, but I can’t change my own feelings either.” Luke picked up his book again. His cigarette had burned out and he threw it on the sidewalk, which Leia assumed he would pick up as soon as she left. Both of them were guilty of doing things just to bother the other.

Leia gave her brother an awkward hug and walked away to find a payphone and call Han. As much as she didn’t want to admit it, she missed him. She’d never really had a boyfriend before (okay, Han wasn’t really her boyfriend, they’d never called it that) and she was trying to be cool about it. But she liked being held, sharing an intimacy with someone outside of her family. 

Chewbacca answered the phone and told her Han was out. Leia tried not to let it bum her out – she still had a Vietnam Day Committee meeting and an English literature lecture to attend, and she didn’t have much time to talk, but just hearing his voice would have made the long day easier. 

For a moment she hesitated, and then picked up the phone again. 

“Mom?” 

“Leia! I’m so glad you called. Is something the matter?”

“I just wanted to hear your voice. I know the quarters you and dad gave me was only supposed to be for emergency calls. But Han’s not around and Luke’s mad at me and I don’t know who else to call,” Leia explained, verging on tears. She really didn’t want to cry in public; she barely cried in front of her parents. 

“Oh sweetie. Do you want me to get your dad too? I think he’s in the garage.” The line went quiet for a moment before her dad’s voice came over the phone.

Leia could hear some fumbling with the phone and then Padme’s voice again. “Why is Luke upset with you?” It was a question she was dreading – Luke wasn’t out to their parents, and while Leia respected it, she hated lying to her parents. 

“We just had a disagreement at breakfast. It’s not a big deal, really. Anyway, I can’t talk long, I have class soon.”

“Well, we miss you a lot, Leia,” said Anakin, “and you’ll get over the fight soon enough.” Leia sighed, hoping her dad was right. But neither of her parents understood having a twin, couldn’t appreciate how it felt to be so close to another person that you could almost hear their thoughts. 

“Bye Leia,” Padme said, and Leia whispered a goodbye back, hanging up the phone.


End file.
